Presence not Personality

It is important not to confuse Presence with Personality. 

It may seem like they enhance each other - that the stronger the personality the greater the sense of Presence. 

In actuality the inverse is true - the greater the sense of Presence, the more the individual ‘personality’/‘self’ fades and takes a back seat.

This is not all that earth-shattering a concept. Any actor or athlete knows about being in the zone, or in a state of Flow. It’s the same thing. In any performance-dependent activity high performance is marked by ease, effortlessness, connectedness and a sense of “I didn’t really do anything, it just happened.”

My life skills are in acting, martial arts, and teaching - all performance arts/skills. The high points of my life in each of these three areas, times when “I” have performed most brilliantly, have all been marked by a feeling of Flow in which I describe my ‘self’ as having ‘gotten out of the way.’  “I” took a powder and something else took over. Of course it was still ‘me’ but the ‘Me’ that performed so effortlessly and brilliantly was a ‘Me’ far larger, more universal and masterful than the ‘David’ personality.

Presence is not something you have. It’s what you Are. 

It shines forth most effortlessly when ‘you’ are ‘You.’  ‘You’ is an expanded state of Being. Whenever I am in a contracted state (fear, anxiety, worry, nervousness, etc), I act from and rely on my personality. When I am in an expanded state (relaxation, joy, playfulness, love, confidence, gratitude, etc) I flow with a natural Presence. Nothing seems impossible and activity is effortless. When the job, game, class or match is over, I actually have more energy than when I started.

When I am acting mostly from personality I often end up feeling worn down, worn out, drained, depleted and unsuccessful. I try too hard to sink the basket, hit the ball, reach my students or be brilliant in front of an audience; and it always feels ‘off.’

When I am in Presence I feel like I can’t miss a basket, and I don’t; I feel I am going to hit the ball, and I do; I feel my students are going to ‘get’ what I am teaching, and they do; I feel the audience is in the palm of my hand, and they are….. Because… in Presence there is no ‘Me.’ 

“I” becomes bigger than a mere ‘me.’ In Presence there are no separate parts, there is only a sense of unity; a wondrous expansive all-encompassing Whole; a merging of the people, the place, and the ‘Play’ (What is going on).  

Interestingly enough there is also a sense of ‘no-time.’ Time doesn’t stand still, it’s just not there - replaced by an immersion in the eternal constancy, of Now.

I do practice Presence skills; voice and body flexibility, posture, eye contact, breathing, gestures, pauses, listening, etc. They are very important because Presence is not an all or nothing state. Presence, or what you Are, can be completely hidden by the personality, can shine through a little, a lot, or radiate totally.

So I practice these skills to increase the Presence percentage of the mix and also because they stand me in good stead when Presence takes a powder and I find myself relying on personality to perform (It happens).  

I practice Presence skills because they give me the confidence and ability to more easily, and consistently, get out of the way; to face high stakes situations with relaxation; to step aside and trust in the wisdom and effortless power of that greater connected ‘Me,’ the Me that is Presence itself.